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I have had very little to no motivation to do what I had to do. I was supposed to take the last chance and I am not sure I did it.
I only worked out 4 days this week.
I started on Tuesday as usual with a run, this same run some other time would’ve been a short one but now it is quite a lot.
On Wednesday I did a brick session. Very fun to do these bricks sessions but I am still too slow.
On Thursday I ran again, I did the long run of the week, and it was only for 75mins. I was able to run very fast but later on my body told me that I couldn’t run any longer this week. I started to feel my shins which are something I should be looking close because I don’t want to stop working out again.
On Friday I took a pretty good ride on the trainer. Although I had a little bit of butt pain I was able to complete it with no problem.
On Saturday and Sunday I was too busy to workout.
My training is unorganized right now. What I gain on week I lose it the next. I need to go back to some structured training. I wish I could say I will be competing soon but right now I have no mood to do so and I should not be doing it because things haven’t been going the way they should be going and I should punish myself.
I am disappointed on my actions in the past 2 weeks and I hope I can redirect my life.
My motivation to keep going is very low. I had no motivation to do anything for too long.
All I wanted to do this week was to go back to one of the closest cities that I have lived and I can fly and take a walk and have some alone time. All I wanted to do were walks in a safe environment, where I felt happy to try to regain that happiness again. I did not want to go with anyone or see anyone, I just wanted to go o my own and think.
I had a hard time writing on a day like today.
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